Hello all! Whew, we made it through the holidays! My kids are back in school, my house has the ever present morning whirlwind that is three kids getting off to school. My brain is mush by the end of the night with homework, sport activities, and making sure I squeeze in all of the cuddles possible to my kids. Pretty much, we are living it up big and busy! Which means it is time to add more to my plate of course! Today I am talking about Changing up the kids bedrooms, I need opinions!
We have a three bedroom house, with a master bedroom and two kids bedrooms. My boys share a room and my daughter has her own room. Which seems like the perfect set-up. I redid Caleb and Gavin’s bedroom about 3 years ago. Putting in a lot of time and energy into making it just the way they needed it for their growing selves.
I also updated Nora’s bedroom last year, bringing in a bigger bed and creating a space that worked for her age. It all seemed perfect, a girly bedroom with tons of book shelves for my girl and a boy bedroom filled with colors and ample play space.
However, behind the scenes it is different. My crew of kids are a close bunch. I do not know if they are closer than the average sibling group, I only have mine to compare. They are together all of the time! Moving from room to room as a unit. They are 9, 8, and 6 years old so are more or less in the same phase of childhood. They do fight, but it is small squabbles that they work out very quickly. We got lucky with these three, they are truly each others best friends. In fact it seems tat with each passing day they get closer as a trio, which makes this Mommy heart of mine burst with love and pride.
With Nora having a bigger bed most nights they even all end up sleeping in her bed. It is the sweetest thing to see my kids cuddling up close at night! We have also had a few struggles of Nora feeling left out because her brothers have each other and they have their room together. My daughter will forever be disappointed we did not have a fourth child, a sister for her. I explained that we had a 50/50 shot of getting another boy, she still thinks we should have gambled with those odds. Ignoring the adult concerns of time, money, maternal health…… blah, blah, blah… she wants a sister!
I get it, I do. I would imagine she feels a little left out when they are in their room and she feels excluded. My two boys have also mentioned that they do not like being separated from her at night. She is the only one in the house that is forced (their words) to sleep alone because my husband and I have each other and the boys have their room. So for months now my kids have been begging me to let them all share a room. They presented me with their plan and I nixed it right away. Three kids in one room? Um, why? How? Huh? No!!!
But, I finally listened to them and really thought about it. This phase in their childhood of them being close will eventually fade away. My Mommy hope is that they will always remain close, but the time of them moving as a unit throughout our home is on borrowed time. I should embrace their closeness. I also realized that I was hesitant for this idea because I love their bedrooms as they are. They are so cute and decorated adorably! Selfishly I do not want to remove all of the pink and blue decor. I would need to use what we have and alter some items to work for a more gender neutral style.
Yes, when they have one friend over there will have to be come compromising on who gets the play room or who gets to hang out in the sleeping room. But even this is not too much of an issue, we live in a small town and with my kids being close in age most of their friends come over and they all play together. They have different ages that mix with other sibling groups, so even that is not too much of a problem. Privacy issues, they each already get dressed in the bathroom so no problem there either. Most of my gut reasons for saying no did not hold up once I considered our family dynamic and lifestyle. I was saying no simply because it is not what is done. Three kids in one room by choice is not the norm, but who says our home has to be normal?!!
Once I was open to the idea I had to figure out the logistics, how do I make this work while giving them what they want and keeping my sanity? Here is the plan I came up with; a sleeping room with three beds. Using the boys bedroom with their built in bunk beds as that room then bringing back up Nora’s twin bed that we have stored in the basement as the needed third bed in the room.
Then turning her bedroom into a kids play room. Putting all of their toys, books and art supplies into this room. We have had an art table for years in our sun room, and they spent hours there creating. When we rearranged our home and put the dining room table in their I separated their art supplied into each of the bedrooms. However, they still crave drawing together and have commandeered the coffee table in the living room for this purpose. Making a corner for all of their art supplies and an art table in the playroom would be wonderful. The boys have a big walk in closet and if I kick my organizing into high gear I can most likely fit all three of the kids clothes within the closet. Which gives me a whole walls worth of closet to turn into shelving for their toys.
My mind has been in overdrive on the possibilities! I gotta say, what was a crazy idea has turned into something I am really leaning towards doing. I have almost all of the furniture needed between their two bedrooms and a few items we have in the basement. What we don’t have I can go DIY style and create. It would all be done with minimal-ish costs and effort. I am planning to reuse a lot of the furniture items in their bedroom, and the decor that does not feel gender neutral will either be sold in a rummage sale or if it is special items I can store until the rooms go back to being separate, which I know will happen eventually.
I am reasonable to know that this room set-up has a big expiration date. I am betting we get two years out of it before one of them is ready for their own space again. But really, the way I have it planned I could easily change things back when the time comes. I have explained to the kids that if we do this they will need to stick it out for a while. There will be no changing it back in 6 months, no one has time for that!
With my kids growing each day I have come to know that this time of life, this time of young kids and a loud house is a phase. I am painfully aware how quick time is flying by. My kids are so lucky to have each other and the fact that their personalities mesh together so well is what I hoped for when we had our babies close together. We planned for this, hoped, wished and craved for this very closeness that they are. Why should I stop them from having that?
The memories made, whispers before falling asleep, giggles in the morning before waking us up, pretend games, art created and fun to be had in these two designated kids rooms will be worth the work. I have no clue on the timetable for this. I know my kids would like it done tomorrow. But with me being… well me… I am also going to paint the sleeping room (formally the boy bedroom) because the walls are in a rough state. I also want to make sure it all functions right, carving out little spots for their own personal treasures, notes, and toys to be. I am a planner and decorator and I get to combine the two with these plans, I am amped up!
As far as this Changing up the kids bedrooms, I need opinions from people who grew up sharing a bedroom with their siblings. How was it? Did you like it? Or maybe you hated sharing a room? What about the people who grew up with their own bedrooms, did you wish you could share a room with your sibling? Let me know your experience. My goal as a parent is to minimize the need for future therapy for my kids. I am a worrier by nature, I worry what this room change will do for them, I worry what it will do to my daughter if I do not let her share a room with her beloved brothers. Pretty much, I worry! What do you think, am I crazy for doing this? Any tips or things I should consider? Let me have it, I can handle the truth.